Here’s what I know about Mardi Gras…
Emma had cash money to spend from her birthday yesterday and it was apparently burning a hole in her pocket. She was *dying* to single-handedly help the economy. She kindly reminded me it is both my parental and American duty to aid her in this capacity so… I took her to the mall earlier today.
Hollister is her current favorite store. I, however, cannot stand how LOUD the damn music is in there so I elected to sit outside and save the marginal hearing that I do have. (Jeez, that makes me sound old! Ugghh.) Anyhoo, while sitting beneath the 10×20 posters of half-naked minors I decided to web surf on my phone. I don’t know how I came across the subject of Mardi Gras, but I did and to my dismay – it is tomorrow!! My plan was to collate for you all the history and decor ideas and recipes for Mardi Gras so you could plan a fabulous party of your very own. Unfortunately, it snuck up on me and I got nothing. Mea culpa.
Given my lack of foresight with the date, I decided to just take a funny picture of myself and consult my sister for some advice. Janice lives in Texas (which is near Louisiana for the geographically challenged) and participates in Mardi Gras every year. Let me be clear – you will not find my sister here:
This girl looks so happy; bless her heart.
Like me, Janice is too smart to have naked pics of herself smeared all over the internet. Also like me, Janice has small boobs and nobody wants to see that shit. However, we have both come to the realization in the last several years that they will NEVER be sloppy. So to those who made fun of us for being members of the IBTC so long ago, we hope you are enjoying your bologna tits today.
Sorry, I got carried away. Back to Fat Tuesday.
My sister tells me that, basically, Mardi Gras is a shit fest. It’s mandatory to have masks, parades, a King cake, beads, booze, music, crawfish, boobs, schlongs, ass, the gays (whom I adore) and a King and Queen. Now that’s a party! So if it’s not too late and you are willing to have a party on a Tuesday I hope you have a great time! Here’s a great site I found with some really useful information – Mardi Gras Day.com.
I have already put next years date in my phone calendar so I can make sure to blog something fabulous for you about having a Mardi Gras party. So until February 12, 2013, my friends, laissez les bon temps rouler (let the good times roll).
Side note & totally off topic, but funny: I can look at my wordpress.com blog stats and stuff to see how many people are viewing the posts and where they are coming from, etc. Someone accessed my blog while they were searching for… are you ready for this shit… Horse Fisting. Because I’m a nice girl I didn’t know what that was & immediately had to Google it. Sure enough, it’s all about bestiality. True story. Sick fuck. Oh well, at least they checked out my blog! HAHAHAHA!!!
P.S. – Go back and read my previous post ‘Giving Credit Where Credit Is Due’ if you don’t know why someone would come across my blog while looking for Horse Fisting.